


Accountable

by tisfan



Series: Tony Stark Bingo [27]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Dating, M/M, Romantic Fluff, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-26
Updated: 2019-02-26
Packaged: 2019-11-05 19:44:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17925155
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tisfan/pseuds/tisfan
Summary: Tony wants to have a stable relationship by New Year’s Eve. Well, Bucky’s here to hold him accountable.For Tony Stark Bingo Square KS - Bucky Barnes / Winter Soldier





	Accountable

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AoifeLaufeyson](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AoifeLaufeyson/gifts).



“Coffee, Black, extra, extra large. And put a few shots in it,” Bucky’s first customer of the day said.

“Resolution?”

“Ton- what?”

“What’s your resolution, for New Years,” Bucky asked.

“You’re going to write that on my cup? You know you’re going to have people in here fighting for the cup of ‘go to the gym more’ by ten a.m.”

“It’s called _accountability_ ,” Bucky said, loftily. “If everyone sees you in the coffee shop with -- what did you say it was?”

“I didn’t. But-- I’d-- I had a shitty night, and my New Year’s kiss was a joke. I’d like to have a real relationship, this year.”

“Get a significant other,” Bucky wrote dutifully on the cup, then Bl, xxg 2sh on the side under it.

He handed the cup off to Sam, who started pulling shots and getting the drink line moving. Wanda rang up the sale, and Bucky went on to the next customer, who, true to SO’s prediction, had lose twenty pounds as their resolution. _Not gonna happen if you keep drinking large lattes, extra whip, sugar._

Bucky’s idea started conversations; at least half a dozen people pulled out their phones when _Call Mom More Often_ picked up her Americano. Two people found workout or walking partners. People lingered in the shop to talk about it; lingering people bought more coffee or muffins. And word spread, the way it tended to do. By lunch, the line was thirty deep.

“Man, I hate you,” Sam said, as Bucky passed yet another cup along.

 _Get an SO_ came up at least three times to get a refill, spending most of the morning poking his tablet industriously, taking advantage of the free wifi. In the relatively dead period just after lunch, while Bucky was clearing off tables, he asked, “So, how do you go about keeping people accountable?”

“Really? I don’t,” Bucky said. He picked up the chair, turned it around and straddled it. “You do it. Once you say it, and someone says it back to you, it’s halfway to being a fact.”

“Is that a fact?”

“It’s psychology,” Bucky said. “The power of saying things outloud.”

“Which is why you… work in a coffee shop, instead of having an office and clients on your couch?”

Bucky only chuckled. “I’m still in school, hot shot. Plus, I like my job. Talking to customers, getting to know people. Testing my threshold for some wall street tool’s dickish behavior. Means I’ll be able to handle him when he’s in my chair, wondering why he still ain’t got a date.”

Sig Other waved a hand near his forehead. “Yeah, okay, you got me. We’re square now?”

“Actually, no,” Bucky said. “Tell you what, why don’t you prove you’re being accountable. Bring your first dates here. Coffee shop meet ups are the thing, and I’ll see you’re taking my advice seriously.”

“You’re going to give me dating advice?”

“You can tell a lot about a person from what they order at the coffee shop,” Bucky told him.

“And what, pray, does my order say about me?”

“Mostly? That you should probably get more sleep. That whatever you do keeps you busy; you don’t have time to be fussy about your coffee. Black’s easy. Hard for someone else to fuck it up. You don’t strike me as the kind of coffee snob who wants black because he pretends he knows shit about the beans and roasting. You probably drink red wine, or scotch. Forget to eat more than you want to admit. And you don’t have very many close friends.”

By the time he was done bullshitting the guy -- playing Sherlock was fun, but it was no more true than Wanda and her tarot cards -- Sig Other’s eyes were huge.

“Okay, you convinced me,” he said. “I’ll bring my dates in. You tell me which ones to bring back.”

***

Bucky hadn’t actually expected Sig Other to come back, much less return with a date. He wasn’t even sure, after the first week of January was over, that he’d have remembered the guy. Waiting on more than five hundred customers a day, it took a lot of repeat business before he usually recognized anyone in more than that vague way of seeing thousands of faces. Even longer before he knew names.

But orders, for whatever reason--

“Oh, hey, Extra Grande, black, right?”

Those brilliant brown eyes, almost the same color as the heart of an espresso pull, lit up. “Hey, it’s the Accountability Guru,. Yeah, please. And--” He gestured and a very lovely woman stepped up behind him.

She was willow, brunette, and way overdressed for a coffee date. Her haircut probably cost more than Bucky made in tips during the day. She glanced up from her phone for a few moments to ponder the menu. “Raspberry latte,” she said. “With the art on it? And a biscotti.”

Bucky wrote the orders down, passed them on. “Do the swan,” he told Wanda. She was the best latte artist they had, not that many people bothered to look into their cups before heading out the door. Might as well give Sig Other a head start, right?  

He watched them between customers, Sig Other keeping a proper date-space for a first meeting, asking questions and appearing interested in her answers.

When she bothered to give them. Mostly she poked her phone. Took a picture of her latte. A selfie. A picture with Sig. Cackled over some responses to her social media of choice. Tipped her screen toward Sig a few times so he could share in the joke.

They stayed about twenty minutes, and then she got up and he saw her to the door and her taxi. A moment later, he was leaning on the pastry counter.

“No,” Bucky said, flatly.

“No?”

“She was dressed way too nice,” Bucky said. “She expected you to wine and dine her. She’s in it for the money. I assume there is some?”

“You could say,” Sig said. “You didn’t like her? She seemed friendly to me.”

“Oh, yeah, sure,” Bucky said, then turned his phone toward Sig. “She dissed out my coffee artist. Real friendly.”

It hadn’t taken him long to find the instagram, not when she tagged the shop by name. _Run of the mill coffee art._ There was more, mostly talking about her date, but Bucky didn’t bother to read that.

“I thought the swan was clever,” Sig said.

“Well, I don’t want to brag, but Wanda’s competed at the WBC, she’s not run-of-the-mill.”

“How is it bragging, when you’re praising her?”

“You want one to go?” Bucky asked, changing the subject.

“Yeah--” Sig paused a moment, then, “It’s Tony, thanks.”

***

Sam nudged him. “Your boy’s got another one.”

Bucky flicked his cigarette and took a long drag. “I’m on break. Another socialite?”

“Naw, if it was that boring shit, I’dda left you out here. He’s got a dude with him this time,” Sam said.

Bucky swallowed his mouthful of smoke and then choked on it. Well, that changed everything, didn’t it?

Except it didn’t.

“You oughta quit that nasty habit,” Sam said, and Bucky waved him off.

He snubbed his butt and tossed it in the ashbin out back. The alley was gross and smelled like stale coffee and rotten muffins, but at least he was allowed to smoke there. There weren’t lots of places left that allowed it.

Went inside, snuck a peek at the line. Sure enough, there was Tony, about ten back, with a good-looking blond guy. Like, underwear model good looking. And then Bucky got a better look at his face. _Oh, god. That guy._

“Is that--”

“Yep.”

“What are we talking about?” Wanda wanted to know.

“Don’t bother trying to get blondie’s coffee right,” Sam told her. “He’ll spend the next twenty minutes telling you what you did wrong. Just pour him a cup and some cream, and then make him what he actually ordered. He never accepts the first one. No point in wasting your time.”

Tony got his usual, and then spend a moment behind blondie’s back making the ‘look at his guy’ gesture with both hands. Bucky’s mouth tipped up in his _the customer is always full of shit_ smile _._

Bucky poured Tony’s coffee, pulled a shot, and went around the side of the counter to give it to him, while blondie was describing how to put half a pump of sweetner in his cup. “Really? This guy? I didn’t know you were into dudes, or I wouldn’t have suggested that you give Heather another date last month.”

“Yeah, no I figured that out when we had a little _discussion_ about Freddie Mercury,” Tony said. “You knew?”

Bucky bobbed his chin around. “I suspected. She’s said some shit, but-- eh. Some people just have a little bi-prejudice, doesn’t affect anybody much, unless they’re dating someone who is bi. Besides, she ticked off all your other boxes.”

“Well, if she’s not going to want to have a relationship because I might have, at some point, touched some other guy’s dick, then the rest of the boxes don’t matter.”

Trust Tony to say something like that, while Bucky was already thinking about the fact that Tony was actually into guys. Bucky shifted uncomfortably. Getting a chub while at work was awkward.

“So what’s wrong with Ty?” Tony looked over again, watching as Ty walked Wanda through the steps of pulling a shot, like she’d never done it before.

“He’s a mansplainer,” Bucky said. “He always knows everything, better than everyone.”

Tony chuckled. “I am, in actual facts, a genius.”

“Won’t matter,” Bucky said. “ _He’s_ the expert.”

“Could be good for a romp,” Tony said. “Experts can be great lovers.”

“Until he starts telling you everything you’re doing wrong,” Bucky pointed out.

Tony looked offended, although Bucky wasn’t sure if it was directed at him, or at Ty for not-yet-occurring critique of Tony’s bed skills. “We’ll see,” Tony said.

“You’re planning to make pancakes for breakfast?” Bucky wasn’t jealous, he wasn’t. Not that it hadn’t been a while since he’d gotten laid, that was irrelevant. Just--

“It’s been looking good, so far,” Tony said.

“Well, have fun,” Bucky said, his smile coming naturally to his face. Yay customer service job.

“I plan to,” Tony said.

***

“Coffee, black.”

“Tony?”

“You were right, if you want to tell me so,” Tony said. “But, coffee first?” His eyes were bloodshot, as if he’d been drinking heavily, or crying. Or both.

“Sure, sure,” Bucky said. He added two shots to the mix. “Here, come on, it’s on the house, are you--”

Sam waved at him. _I got this._

“-- are you okay?”

Tony held up his hand and waggled it back and forth. “We had a big fight,” he said. “It, uh, didn’t end well. But hey, I had almost three months of a relationship. Well, a little more than two, at least. Too bad it’s freaking October. I’m… running out of time.”

“You’re not running out of time,” Bucky told him, scoffing. “You’re in your prime. Plenty of time to find someone, settle down.”

“I mean, I know,” Tony said, sinking down in his chair, “that I don’t need someone to make me happy, that my life has meaning and value. And just because I’m alone, it doesn’t mean I’m unlovable. See, I’ve been talking to my therapist, right.”

“Well, no,” Bucky said, hesitant. Tony thought he was _unlovable_? He was the most interesting person that Bucky knew. “You’re pretty damn amazing, actually. Smart and sexy, funny. You’re interesting, you’re unabashedly nerdy, and enthusiastic about your geekiness. But not a gatekeeper. Really, Stone didn’t deserve you. He was a dick. I think you’re a hell of a catch, and I don’t understand why people are bein’ so dense about it. I--” _would totally date you._

“Yeah, no, I’m-- I’m just not seeing it,” Tony said, and he turned his phone around to show Bucky a hungover frownie face selfie. “Not… just not happening this year. I’m done. Accountability shows that I tried, but this year is just another fucking washout.”

“Um…” Bucky licked his lip, hesitating. “Uh, maybe it’s not?”

“Yeah, why, what do you think, the perfect person’s going to just plop themselves in my lap? I mean, I know you work in a coffee shop--” Tony pushed his chair away from the table. “-- and you’re apparently delusional enough to be a romantic, but--”

Bucky stood up, took a deep breath--

\--and plopped himself into Tony’s lap.

“I _am_ an incurable romantic. I _do_ work in a coffee shop, and maybe the perfect person for you _is_ absolutely going to throw themselves in your lap.”

_Please God, let this work, because otherwise, this is the stupidest thing I’ve ever done in my life._

Tony almost dropped him, before scrambling to get an arm around Bucky’s waist. “Wh-- oh. Oh. Oh, my _god_.”

“Would you, erm… like to go out? I know a great coffee shop--”

Tony blinked a few times. Then his arm tightened on Bucky’s waist. “Yeah, yeah, I think I might like that. Wouldn’t want to, you know, fail in my resolution.”

“Don’t worry,” Bucky said. “I’ll hold you accountable.”


End file.
